A Terra Ad Caelus

Day 1

Not really the first day. Fourth, maybe.

Still nothing. No cars, no helicopters (makes sense), no people. Still chucking it down outside.

Nosh is running low. Think this must have been the final lot to be shipped to the food bank. Just cans of green beans and fuck all else.

Found this notepad and pen in the vestibule. vestary. pastor’s office. Hope he doesn’t mind. Gonna start a little diary so I don’t go loopy. More loopy, anyway. Loopier?

Been checking for leaks around the church. All clear so far. Yay. Damp around front door: must look for something to seal the bottom. Possible options?
– Basement? Might have sandbags or something
– Priest clothes—some bits are already red, would hide the stains
– Paper from hymnbooks/bibles—LAST RESORT

Gonna try and sleep. Let’s see if I remember writing any of this tomorrow.

Can’t sleep. Rain too loud. Still seeing the angel the light- it whenever I close my eyes. Like when you look at a bulb for too long and you see those little neon squiggles for ages after. Stamped directly onto your eyeballs. Same kind of thing, except the image keeps moving.

Like it’s still there, in my eyes. On my eyes.

***

Day 2

Sleep was bad. Still raining. Still nothing outside.

Basement is locked (because of course it is). Still can’t find any keys—think the pastor took them all with him. My shoulder is going to break before the door does. Robes it is.

It doesn’t have much of a smell. Maybe the fall stripped the smell away.

The light is coming through the windows like they’re all made of the same stuff as the lenses in Liam’s 3D glasses. Well, the left one. It’s like being in an oven or a microwave, except I’m always fucking cold. Everything is so RED.

Miss you, Liam. Hope you and Mum are okay.

Been trying to read stuff about what happened. I don’t know how anyone gets through this shit. The bible needs a glossary. Would be so much easier if it just said ‘rapture, page 342’ or whatever.

Turns out the bible does have a glossary. Makes sense; Pastor probably needed it for teaching. Would’ve been nice to have realised FOUR HOURS AGO. Anyway, it’s Matthew. Good ol’ Matty.

Matthew 24:30-31
30 Then will appear the sign of the Son of Man in heaven. And then all the peoples of the earth will mourn when they see the Son of Man coming on the clouds of heaven, with power and great glory.
31 And he will send his angels with a loud trumpet call, and they will gather his elect from the four winds, from one end of the heavens to the other.

fuck.

***

Day 4

Forgot to write yesterday.

Did some more reading. Got fuck all else to do.

It can’t have been an angel. It was just light. Just pure light ← Then what am I seeing when I close my eyes?? Pastor looked so happy at first. Why did he scream?? What did he see??

Gonna try and draw what I see when I close my eyes.

angels dont look like that

they cant

***

Day 9

My name is Terrence- Terry Samuel Patterson. I’m either forty-three or forty-four. I’m writing this on the- during April of 2027.

If you’re reading this, I might be dead. Hopefully I’m not, but I might be. If I had to guess, it’s because I starved to death. I hope that’s how it happened. Drowning seems pretty awful. Either way, I’m hoping against all hope that when I’m gone, my eyes stop working. I don’t want to see it anymore. Every time I blink, it feels like it’s getting closer.

I’m writing this now because the church is flooding.

I can’t get out, but it seems to have no problem getting in. Maybe that means something.

If you find this notepad, please take it to Liam Patterson or Cindy Patte- Forcette. I want Liam to have something of his Dad’s, even if it’s just this shitty diary. I love you, mate.

Also, if you’re reading this, maybe everything has stopped and the world is back to normal. I hope so. Maybe you won’t even know what I’m talking about. I really, truly hope so, too.

I was (am?) homeless. Divorced, kicked out, etc etc. Came to this church because that’s what churches are for, right? Sanctuary and shelter. It felt like the only place left to go. I’m not even religious. Thank God. Hah. The pastor welcomed me in and let me stay the night. I feel like an absolute arse because I can’t remember his name. If you can, please check his office. He’s a good man and he deserves to be remembered.

Anyway, it happened that evening. It was just the two of us. I was sitting on one of the benches and he was telling me about the food bank. Something about their program with the council, I think. The most mundane conversation in the world. I was trying not to cry, and I think he noticed, because he kept asking me questions; kept prompting me to stay with him in the moment, so I wouldn’t sink into absolute bloody misery.

We heard a noise. This deep, droning noise, like we’d suddenly been surrounded by a plague of locusts. Truly fucking biblical.

And it just got louder and louder and louder, and this light started shining from outside, like a spotlight was blasting directly into every single possible crack of the church. It was so quick, we didn’t even realise until it was inside the church with us. Just this radiant ball of light, brighter than the sun, brighter than light should ever be. But, it didn’t hurt to look at. It should have—it was bright enough to blind you—but it didn’t. It didn’t.

And when the pastor looked into the light, he—

Sorry for the missing pages. Had to move to higher ground and got splashed on. The pews are all under, now.

The look on his face. It was like every single thing in the universe suddenly made sense. He sort of smiled, but it was a confused smile, like an addict’s when you try expressing concern. Like, they know something is funny, but don’t know why it shouldn’t be.

I just sat there. I didn’t know. I only realised a split second before it took him, because his expression changed; like a hare in the jaws of a fox.

I think he tried to scream, but wasn’t able to. Liam has epilepsy, so I know what seizures look like, but whatever came over the pastor was more severe than I’d ever seen. I can’t get it out of my head.

And then he was gone. So was the light. And the sound. All of it, like a switch had just been flipped. I was alone.

He’d already locked up the church for the night. I don’t know what it looks like now, but as I’m writing this, the windows were way too high up to climb through and the doors weren’t budging either. Stuck like a green bean in a tin.

At first, I figured someone would come and get me tomorrow, and I’d explain to them whatever the fuck had just happened. It’d sound dodgy as hell, but what other choice did I have, right?

Then it started raining.

It started early in the morning, I think. No clocks in here and I never got to grab my phone before I was kicked out of the house, so time in here is pretty much measured by the shades of red coming through the windows. Anyway, I didn’t think much of it, besides being surprised at how sudden and heavy it was. Like the Heavens broke, as my mam used to say. It wasn’t until I woke up that I realised how fucked I was. God, I hope it’s stopped by the time you read this.

Because, right now, it’s still going. It hasn’t stopped for a second, and it’s been over a week. I’m trapped in this stupid church and it’s in my eyes and I’m going to drown or starve or

Okay. I found a knife. In the office. Had to wade up to my waist to get it. I think it’s ceremonial, but it’s sharp enough. I love you, Liam. I love you, Cindy. I’m sorry it didn’t work out, and I’m sorry for this. I’m just so scared. I don’t know what else- I’ll be alright.

Besides, it’s been raining this long; what difference is a couple extra drops of the stuff gonna make?